Friday, September 9, 2011

Toddlers: Time Suckers

Toddlers are expert time suckers.  They can take a normal activity and stretch it out- with the addition of singing, tantrums, playing, shitting or whining- sometimes all of the above!- for a good hour.  It's impressive.  Throw in potty training and, well, the shit goes haywire.

Accordingly, this is what my day looks like with my toddler:
*Time required to eat a meal: at least 45 minutes
*Time required to clean up body parts and scene after meal: 10 minutes
*Time required to leave the house: 20 minutes (add another 10 for every additional child)
*Time required to sit on the potty before leaving the house: 15 minutes
*Time required to convince toddler to sit on the potty before leaving the house: 5-10 minutes
*Time required to ascertain whether toddler needs to sit on the potty before peeing pants: ALL THE LIVELONG DAY
*Time required for toddler to fall asleep: 20 minutes- 2 hours (depends on how many songs are floating around in said toddler's head)
*Time required to recover from a day with toddlers: 18 years

So that leaves, what, 5 minutes to get everything else accomplished for the day?  No problem.

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